Right, so what I’ve decided to do today is, even though I’m still meaning to have my cancer charity rant, stick to “news” papers. I was reading the Metro today on the tube. For those of you that don’t know it, it’s a free “news” paper you get on the London Underground and I think I can improve it, so this is kinda like a open letter to them. Let us begin!
Tag Archives: English
The Most Important Things I’ve Learnt All Day or; The Most Least Important Things I’ve learnt All Day
I have literally just lost all respect for the BBC as a respectable news source. There’s a report on their website from two days ago, warning people about a dangerous new craze that’s started going round. It’s called “prinking” and it’s truly awful. It’s when you have a night out, maybe go to a club or something, but before you go out you have some drinks in the house. Pre-drinking. That’s right. the BBC are reporting having some drinks in the house a “new trend”.
I’m learning welsh and it’s awesome. I literally know every single thing on the “lesson 1” bit of the website. I’m all over this shit. Welsh should be learning me. I did find out that when you’re talking about (or talking too? Ironically I can’t work out the English bits) God you can be informal. He’s such a cool dude, that God. He just doesn’t give a fuck. I wish I was as chilled out as God.
Hello there, Internets! How the devil are you? I’ve not done this “blogging” thing in quite a while, but don’t be mad for I have a very good reason…
You ever heard of a cartoon called Regular Show? I hadn’t either until about two weeks ago and now, whenever I come online with intentions of being productive, I fuck it all off and marathon that cartoon. It’s properly, properly banging good.
I just found out that words like ‘twerking’, ‘selfie’, ‘girl-crush’, ‘LOL’ and ‘BFF’ have been added to the dictionary and the word ‘literally’ has a new meaning now. According to the dictionary literally means;
In a literal manner or sense; exactly: “the driver took it literally when asked to go straight over the traffic circle”
And it also means;
Used to acknowledge that something is not literally true
I was going to write a blog about water getting stolen off of us by oil companies the other day, but that went to shit when I had to go to hospital. I was punched, or possibly fell, and now my shoulder hurts. Apparently I’ve “bruised the bone” according to the doctor, but I don’t believe him one bit. Call me racist but I just cannot trust a white doctor, let alone an English doctor. Is that racist? Probably not. I’d trust an English doctor of Asian decent (any kind of Asian), but not a straight-up English doctor. Unless they’re a hot English woman. Then they can have some of my trust. Hot women have never let me down.