Why Britain is the Greatest Country Ever.

Ha! How does that feel, poor people? You’re not never allowed to live a life of comfort anymore because you don’t deserve money because you’re poor and the rich people aren’t rich enough for their liking so pay up, scum! People need their silver spoons polished and as you can’t afford silver spoons in the first place you should give your silver polish money to the fucking Tories.

Have a spare room in your house? Well get the fuck out! You don’t deserve a home. It’s OK, though. Just pop down to your nearest Citizens Advice bureau and they can advise you with what to do in terms of housing, etc. Oh wait! You’ll probably get fuck all help from them because their funding has just been cut from twenty-two million pounds down to just three-fucking-million! It makes you sick, doesn’t it? Best go to the doctors.

Burn! The NHS has also been pushed deep down into the shit-pit, so you’ll get very little help from them, too! I think we all need to write an angry letter to parliament and express our outrage. Ah shit! The cost of using the postal service has gone up today, too? Fuck. I need a drink.

Not water, though! Why’s that? Water rates have gone up, too? Ah, Jesus Christ! How is anyone suppose to live a life of reasonable hope now? Well I’ll tell you how. You need to get the fuck back in time and be born into a rich as shit family. I would say just go back to when our current government got voted in, but no-one voted for them anyway, so you have to go really far back.

But just being born into money isn’t good enough. You should make a living by working for the banks and robbing everyone fucking blind and gambling with anyone elses’ money but your own. Then, when you lose everyone elses’ money, make them give you more in the form of taxes so you can continue living your life of luxury while good, honest people with familys and dreams are forced to make a choice between eating food or paying rent, you fucking fascist cunts.

I was going to put a photo of David Cameron on here with the phrase “This man needs to be brutally raped and murdered” but seeing his smug fucking face makes me want to punch my laptop and I don’t want all you guys to punch your screens in a rage too. We’d only get taxed for needing new ones.


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