My Favorite Response to My Favorite Heckle(r).


I loved the Edinburgh Fringe in 2010. It did nothing for my career, but boy-oh-boy was it a shit-load of fun. I did a show with Bob Slayer called “Bob Slayers Punk Rock Chat Show”. It’s wasn’t so much a chat show as it was an orgy of booze and (un)organised chaos. One night we went to see the midnight show at The Jekyle and Hyde but the act didn’t show up, so Bob and myself decided to commandeer the place for a full three hours. Her is a short film from that night:

As you can see, we are very drunk. That night actually ended in me not being allowed back into the venue, so I just stood outside and annoyed the FUCK out of the bouncer who wouldn’t let me in. He then started a fight on someone with all the pent-up rage and hate I filled him with. Then the guy he tried to fight smashed the pub door in with a bit of a fence. It was very epic indeed. Anyway, you can see a short shot of a shoe being thrown at me. The guy who did this came to our actual show the next day. In the show there was a bit where people threw money at me. See next video.

One day, during this, all hell broke loose for some reason, and I ended up having to dodge chairs, bottles, pint glasses, shot glasses, anything you find in a club that isn’t tied down, and also the same shoe from the night before. The bastard had me twice! This shoe hit me again the next day. And the next day. And the next day. So, to teach the guy a lesson, I urinated in his shoe before giving it back the last. He had to go see Jimmy Carr then walk home with a piss filled shoe. There was also a girl in the front row I had been trying to sleep with, but I got a bit of piss on her and we’ve not spoken since. It was my own fault though. Instead of handing him the piss-filled show I threw it over the crowd and got my pee on quite a few people. Well worth it though. There are many other stories from this festival, but I shall save them for another time. The “Child Abuse at Craggs” story being my favourite.

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